The Two Week ‘Last Longer’ Course
Day Eight: An Acid Test
Welcome to day eight of this two week course. It’s going well—you’re learning lots of varied techniques for fighting the battle against premature ejaculation and winning.
Today is a little different. We’re going to talk about an acid test. But don’t worry, we won’t be getting acid anywhere near your penis. That would be counter-productive, to say the least. No, an acid test means doing a little experiment to determine exactly what’s going on with you and your penis—why are you coming too quickly? Now, it might seem like this acid test would have been more useful at the start of this course, but in fact it doesn’t matter when you do them—doing them at all is what matters.
The cause of your premature ejaculation is most probably one of the following.
1. You’re naturally prone to coming too quickly.
2. You experience some kind of anxiety during sex which makes you come too quickly.
3. You suffer from a mixture of the two causes above.
So far, so good.
The reason it’s important to determine which of the above three causes is responsible for your problem with premature ejaculation, is because each one has a different solution. For example, if you’re naturally prone to coming too quickly (1), then your best bet is the use training techniques like the ones detailed in the previous two emails. If you can masturbate all night without coming too quickly, but reach the point of no return within just a few minutes of initiating sex with your partner (2), then the anxiety that’s causing the problem must be dealt with before anything else is done. If the cause of your problem is a mixture of the two just outlined (3), then a dualistic solution is needed. You need to mix a change in mindset with the regular use of physical training techniques. Here’s a quick and simple way to find out which cause is your cause.
- Are you able to masturbate for a long time without any chance of coming against your will, but—when you have sex with your partner—do you come within the first 60 seconds? If your answer is yes, then you probably have an anxiety problem.
- Do you come within 4 or 5 minutes of starting sex but have no problems when masturbating? If your answer is yes, then the cause of your premature ejaculation is probably a mix of causes 1 and 2.
- Do you really struggle to control when you climax when you perform solo training technique #1 and when you have sex with your partner? If your answer is yes, then you most likely are prone to coming too quickly regardless of the circumstances. You need to train yourself to last longer.
- Do you have no problem controlling when you come when you masturbate and can last at least ten minutes when you have sex with your partner? If your answer is yes, then your problem with premature ejaculation can be considered fairly mild. You probably just want to extend your sexual performance to twenty or thirty minutes+. Again, you need to train yourself to last longer using solo and co-op techniques.
Hopefully you now have a fairly good idea of what kind of premature ejaculation you’re suffering from. In tomorrow’s email, we’ll cover the first co-op technique of this course. A co-op technique is something you do while having sex with your partner that doesn’t just delay your orgasm, but also trains your body/penis to refrain from coming too quickly all the time.
Email #10 – Day Nine: Co-op Technique #1
Hi. Welcome to day nine of this two week course. Today, as mentioned in yesterday’s email, we’re going to discuss something called a co-op technique. A co-op technique (which stands for cooperative) is one which involves you and your partner. There are two ways to handle this. If your partner knows that you have a problem with rapid ejaculation and is the understanding type, then you can ask her if it’s okay for you to do this co-op technique one night. If, however, you’d rather not bring the subject out into the open or if you think your partner might find this a bit weird, then you’ll have to do it stealthily and slightly differently. We’ll start with the first option: you and her, working co-operatively, out in the open.
Begin sex as usual. Initiate foreplay and make it last at least 5 or 10 minutes. This can include kissing, massaging/groping, oral (as long as it doesn’t make you go over a 6 on the stimulation scale) and anything else you can think of and both enjoy doing. You should have briefed your partner ahead of time on what you’re both going to do. Here it is. You’re going to have sex in five different sex positions. These are:
1. Missionary position (you on top, as she lies under you).
2. Spoons (you both lying on your sides, with you behind her).
3. Cowgirl (her on top, facing you).
4. Reverse missionary (she lies totally flat on her belly, you kneel—with one knee on either side of her body—above her)
Okay, you’re going to perform these in the order shown above. You’re going to perform each position for as long as it takes you to reach a 7 or 8 on the stimulation scale. While performing each position you should ask yourself the following questions (either silently, or as a discussion with your partner).
1. How tight does this feel on my penis?
2. How intense is the stimulation on my penis?
3. How quickly is it building up the stimulation?
4. How long does it take for me to go from 0 to 8 on the stimulation scale while in this position?
5. How easy is it for me to bring myself back down the stimulation while in this position by altering my thrust speed, depth and angle?
By asking yourself the questions above, you’ll be able to determine exactly which sex positions afford you the most control of your stimulation levels and which afford you the least. Based on this information, you can then rank them from the most intense to the least intense and then—you guessed it—use them in this order during your subsequent sexual encounters. Don’t worry about it getting samey. You can still mix it up a bit. The important thing is that you now know which positions are a big no-no when you’re already on the edge of coming. That’s a very, very useful piece of knowledge to have.
If you don’t want to or simply can’t do this experiment openly with your partner, so she knows what you’re doing, then do it secretly. If you can’t take a break between each position to cool off before trying the next one, as you should do when performing the experiment openly with your partner, then you’ll need to spread the experiment over several sexual encounters. This is okay, it will just take a little longer to put together your list of most intense sex positions and the least intense sex positions.
Tomorrow we’ll cover another co-op technique that you can use to help build you sexual stamina.
Email #11 – Day Ten: Co-op Technique #2
This technique, like the last one, is used while having sex with your partner. Unlike the last technique, however, you can’t really use it secretly, without your partner knowing. If you did, it’d look quite strange. Here’s how it works. You’ve learned solo training techniques one and two. Solo technique #1 involved slowly building your sexual stimulation while masturbating, to go from just under a 7 to just under a 9—or stop just before you come. This edging technique, as you learned, can be used to build up a resistance to extreme sexual stimulation. In other words, it allows you to easily refrain from coming, even when you’re pretty high on the stimulation scale. The natural progression from solo technique one is to use it cooperatively, while with your partner. So, a week or so after using solo technique #1 a good few times, begin sex with your partner. You should have already discussed that you’re going to try edging during this sexual encounter and she should be happy and enthusiastic about the idea. After foreplay, enter your partner in the position you know creates the smallest amount of sexual stimulation for you. You should know which position this is from when you performed co-op technique #’1. Now slowly build your way up to 7 on the stimulation scale. Be careful—it’s easy to jump right past 7 and pass the point of no return when using the edging technique in ‘live’ conditions. Once you’re at or just beyond 7, and therefore fairly close to coming, slow down or withdraw from your partner, wait a moment, then build it back up once more. Keep going just as you do it when performing edging by yourself. After a while, you can switch to the next least intense sexual position and start the edging process once more. Of course, your partner doesn’t have to just lie there and let you beaver away throughout all of this. You can still kiss her, talk to her, tease her, etc. In other words, done right, this co-op technique is awesome for your partner, even though it’s serving a productive purpose for you. Keep going through sexual positions, edging throughout each one. If you come after a while, don’t worry about it. You’ve made good progress. Next time, you’ll be able to go even further.
At this point you can do one of two things. You can finish the sexual encounter by making your partner come (probably manually or orally) or you can finish by using the co-op version of solo technique #2. This is great. You get into your least intense sex position and go crazy, pound the hell out of her. She’ll love it. Don’t be surprised when you feel yourself soar up the stimulation scale in matter of just a few seconds. That’s okay and to be expected. Just as you’d do when performing the second solo technique, when you hit a 7 or 8, slow right down or totally withdraw from your partner. When you’re lower on the scale, go at it crazy style once more. You can go ahead and come after doing this 4 or 5 times.
You won’t believe how effective this co-op technique is when used in conjunction with the two solo techniques. After just three or four sexual encounters, during which you’ve used this technique, you’ll notice that you can last twice or even three times as long as you used to, before you used any of these techniques.
Tomorrow we’ll delve even further into the subject of improving your sexual stamina.
Day Eleven: Breathing…
Time certainly seems to be passing quickly. We’re already on day eleven of this two week course. So, without further ado, let’s move onto today’s lesson in how to boost your sexual stamina. It goes like this…
When men and women have sex, they each have several mutual goals. They are:
- To have fun
- To experience and deliver physical and emotional pleasure
- To have an orgasm
Those are the basics of any sexual encounter. Your problem is that the last thing on the list above happens before the two other things have taken place for the desired amount of time. When you examine what happens when men and women come, there are a few striking similarities. Both sexes have that feeling that sexual stimulation and sensation are building in their ‘private regions’. They both get that sudden feeling about five seconds before they come when they know it’s going to happen. Those a few of the similarities. But there’s also a key difference between the male and female orgasms which is worth taking note of. It concerns breathing or not breathing during the minute or so before the orgasm could technically take place. If a woman unconsciously holds her breath for the minute or so before she could potentially come, it will tend to delay her orgasm—in other words, make it harder for her to come. However, if a man holds his breath for the minute or so before he could come, it will tend to make him come faster. God knows why this is the case, but it is. So when you are having sex and want to delay when you come, you should always focus on doing the following:
- Breathe slowly and in a regular fashion. Don’t take random breaths only when you need them.
- Breathe deeply, focussing on your lower chest and belly. Expanding your belly as you breathe helps you take in more air, which relaxes you and keeps you calm.
- NEVER hold your breathe. Just don’t do it. It tenses you up and puts you on edge, making you much more likely to come too soon.
Combine the above advice on proper breathing with the knowledge you now have on which sex positions provide you with the most and least sexual stimulation and you should be able to significantly boost the duration and quality of your sexual performance.
Day Twelve: Relaxation is the Key to Control
Hi. It’s very important you don’t have the knee-jerk reaction a lot of men with premature ejaculation have when they’re give advice that involves words like ‘relax’ and ‘stay calm’. They think it’s mumbo jumbo—they want some kind of magical technique that’ll instantly sort out the problem instead. Take yesterday’s email, for example. If you’ve had the chance to try the technique it described, which involved controlling your breathing, you’ll know how effective it is at delaying your orgasm. So, based on that, let’s talk more about how you need to focus on staying in the present and totally aware of what’s going on in your head and body.
This is present in 99.9% of men who ejaculate sooner than they or their partner would truly like. It’s a negative thought process that focuses on either the past or the future, but hardly ever on the present. Let’s take an imaginary guy called Mike, who reaches orgasm too soon. He knows this and is very, very conscious of the fact that he wishes he could last longer and satisfy himself and his partners more. He’s been sexually active for a few years, it doesn’t really matter how long – the point is, he’s not happy with his performance. Fast forward to a sexual encounter. Even before foreplay has begun – as soon as the opportunity or chance of having sex has arisen – in the back of his mind is the nagging thought, “This time I’d like to last longer than I have in the past, but will I ejaculate too soon?”. Already, either consciously or subconsciously, his performance is tainted with negative emotion. It’s providing extra pressure he really doesn’t need. Before sex he was thinking about foreplay, during foreplay he’s thinking about how he’s going to satisfy the female, and all the while at the back of his mind overshadowing his thoughts is that question, “Am I going to ejaculate too soon?”. This technique focuses on bringing you into the present and avoiding the negative emotion that’s brought on by thinking about what has happened in the past, or what might happen the next time you have sex.
Totally aside from sex, you can witness how we operate on auto-pilot. Everyday, we’re taking ourselves out of the present and into the future when we really don’t need to. Walking down the street you’re thinking of work, at work you’re thinking about sex, during sex...well, we know what you’re thinking about during sex. The point is, to fully relax and focus and enjoy sex for long periods, you need to be in the present. Inadvertently thinking about what might happen – ejaculating too soon – takes your focus off what is actually happening: you’re moving up the stimulation scale. This in turn hampers your ability to identify how close you are to an orgasm, making its prevention impossible.
This technique has one simple goal: to increase your self-awareness and bring you back into the present during sex. It’s used during the plateau stage of sex, the hard part, where keeping control of yourself is the most important and difficult.
What you need to do is, every now and then, ask yourself a couple of simple questions in your head. “Do I feel tense or relaxed?” and “How close am I to reaching orgasm?”. It’s really important you say the questions in your head and not just “think” them. Actually say each word. The first question uses a simple psychological principle to relax you and bring you into the situation at hand. If, after asking yourself if you feel tense, you notice your shoulders are tight, or that you’re tensing your stomach when it’s not necessary, you don’t need to think of what to do next. Your shoulders automatically drop and your tense mid-section relaxes. Asking yourself the second question, “How close am I to reaching orgasm?” is something you should be doing throughout sex – identifying where you are on the stimulation scale. This brings you into the present and focuses you, but actually saying the question in your head once in a while is doubly effective.
Day Thirteen: Your PC Muscle
Hey. That’s right—today is the penultimate day of this 14 day course. And this email’s going to cover a big topic: your PC muscle. Let’s get right into it.
When you come, a certain muscle involuntarily contracts—it does this each and every time you have an orgasm. It is the PC muscle. PC stands for Pubococcygeus, so you can see why we’ve shortened it. We won’t go into what its physiological function is or exactly where in your body it resides (except to say that if feels like it’s in your, well, ass)—because what’s the point? All you need and probably want to know is how the PC muscle can help you gain a greater degree of control over your sexual stimulation and therefore when you come during sex. Here’s how to locate it. When you take a pee, you tense your PC muscle to stop the flow. Or, when you’re absolutely busting, you tense your PC muscle to stop the flow from…flowing. If you still aren’t sure what or where it is, next time you come pay attention to which muscle down there twitches every second or so until you finish ejaculating. Okay, so you now know which muscle it is. Now you need to get used to isolating it. Try tensing it right now, but don’t tense any other muscle down there. Don’t tense your legs and don’t tense your buttocks. Tense your PC muscle, hold it for 2 seconds, then relax. You’ve just performed one Kegel. A Kegel is a way of exercising your PC muscle by doing what you just did—tensing, holding and releasing. Doing Kegels regularly strengthens your PC muscle, which gives you an increased degree of control over your orgasm. You become much better at keeping your stimulation level steady during sex, instead of it going up and down as it wishes, out of your control. Here’s a good beginner’s routine which you can use three times a week to tone up your PC muscle and thereby increase your sexual stamina and control.
- Start by doing 20 Kegels. Each repetition should go like this: tense as hard as you can, hold it for 2 seconds, then relax. Wait a couple of seconds, then repeat.
- Your PC muscle will probably feel quite tired after doing 20 reps, so give it a break for a few minutes. Then, do 5 reps that go like this: tense using a medium amount of strength, hold it for 5 seconds, then relax.
After a few weeks, you’ll notice the difference in bed. Your erections will feel harder and more ‘powerful’ and your ability to control your sexual sensations will have improved. You can either continue to use the PC muscle routine above, or develop your own, more advanced routine, by adding reps and tensing for longer during each rep.
Day Fourteen: ‘Slick Means Safe’ and a Sum Up!
It’s time for the final technique of this course and it couldn’t be more straightforward and effective. It’s called Slick Means Safe or, if you prefer, The Wetter the Better. It goes like this.
The reason you are coming too quickly when you have sex with your partner is because your penis is becoming over-stimulated. It’s receiving too much stimulation too soon. So, the obvious counter-measure to this problem is reducing the friction and therefore lessening the intensity of the action, right? Right. But what’s the best way to do this? One way, which many men use, is to wear a thick condom. This works to some degree, but unless you and your partner don’t mind always using a thick condom when you have sex, it’s a pretty bad solution. Another option is using some kind of numbing or desensitising cream. This is clearly a terrible idea. Who wants to numb out their penis (and probably their partner’s private parts too) just to have sex for a bit longer? That’s right—no one. The best solution involves no condoms and no creams, but it does still reduce the amount of friction on your penis as you have sex. Basically, it involves getting your partner as wet as you possible can before and during intercourse. This might sound like a pretty lame solution, but you haven’t tried it yet. When you do try it, you’ll immediately see how beneficial it is for your partner to be almost dripping wet with her own juices as you have sex. Not only does it mean she’s crazily turned on and experiencing a ton of pleasure, it also means that your penis can glide in and out of her at any speed without experiencing any extreme friction, which could push you over the edge. So, how do you get your partner really, really wet? Here are some tips:
- Even before starting foreplay, you need to turn your partner on. You do this by getting her in the mood. You should know how to do this already, because you know your partner better than anybody, but you can try: talking slowly and descriptively about how horny and turned on you feel and how sexy and tempting she looks. Don’t randomly start doing this in the middle of the street. Wait until the scene and mood is right. Build it slowly and make it genuine. Begin slowly touching her, but NOT on her most sexual areas, like her breasts and between her legs. Softly touch her neck and slide your fingertips up and down her bare arms. You get the idea. Be smooth and sensual.
- Now start foreplay. Dedicate lots of time to teasing your partner before making oral or manual contact with her vagina. You want her to be gagging for your mouth and fingers before she gets them.
- Start foreplay using your mouth and fingers. If you know you aren’t very good with oral, get practising! Read up on good techniques and use them on your girl.
- During oral or other foreplay, check how wet she is getting by inserting your fingers into her vagina. Keep pleasing her until she’s really wet and, well, almost sticky down there.
- When you start penetration, she will be really wet, so don’t dry her up by pumping her hard and fast straight away. Start really slow and steady. This will get her even wetter and will also allow you to keep your stimulation levels under control.
You can also increase the slickness of sex by using water-based lube, lots of saliva and—this one’s gold dust and most men don’t know about it—having sex in a room that is NOT anywhere near too warm or dry. If it’s hot in the room, your woman will dry up super fast and the friction will set you off before you’re ready. So keep it slick and keep the room comfortably cool.
Now let’s do a speed recap of everything we’ve covered in this course.
- Stimulation Awareness
- The Correct Mindset
- The 7-2-7 Technique
- Staying in control when she’s on top
- Pre-empting the problem
- Solo training technique #1
- Solo training technique #2
- The Acid Test: Why are you coming too soon?
- Co-op technique #1
- Co-op technique #2
- The Importance of Breathing Correctly
- Proper Relaxation
- Your PC Muscle and how to train it
- How to get her really ready for sex and thereby lengthen your sexual performance
That might sound like an awful lot of information to take in, but just try to tackle the techniques one at a time. Work at them slowly and carefully, while all the time training your PC muscle. Whenever you have sex, even if you’re still finding it hard not to come too soon, try to use at least one of the training techniques you’ve learned, like co-op technique #1 and #2.
And finally, when it comes to banishing premature ejaculation from your life, all of the information you’ve learned during this course is a great start—but that’s all it is: a start. There’s a wealth of other information still out there for you to read and learn. But before you do that, use what you’ve already learned.
Good luck (to be honest, with the amount of stuff you now know, you shouldn’t need it)…
Day fifteen : Hope you enjoyed the course
I hope you’ve enjoyed this two week course. I hope you agree it’s been packed with easy to use and useful tips. But we’re nowhere near done.
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This Free course has been created for you courtesy of Edward White at http://www.prejaculation.com
